back here again
writers’ workshop was great. now i need a cuppa coffee.
WM
“If think if I were a woman I’d wear coffee as a perfume.”
— John van Druten
“Coffee? Yeah, I could drink the hell out of a cup of coffee.”
— P. Megrath
“Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat.”
— Alex Levine
“…coffee falls into the stomach…ideas begin to move, things remembered arrive at full gallop…the shafts of wit start up like sharp-shooters, similies arise, the paper is covered with ink…
— Honore de Balzac
“I have measured out my life with coffee spoons…”
— T.S. Eliot
“Coffee should be black as Hell, strong as death and sweet as love.”
— Turkish proverb
“It was one of those mornings when a man could face the day only after warming himself with a mug of thick coffee beaded with steam.”
— Richard Gehman
“After all, coffee is bitter, a flavor from the forbidden and dangerous realm.”
— Diane Ackerman
“Coffee gives me warmth, waking, an unusual force and a pain that is not without very great pleasure.”
— Napoleon Bonaparte
“Actually, this seems to be the basic need of the human heart in nearly every great crisis — a good, hot cup of coffee.”
— Alexander King
, 
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Ah, coffee. Which reminds me of the reasons I heart New Seasons.
Now, don’t get excited, I really have issues with the bastards. But here’s what I do like:
1. Free espresso drinks while shopping. Just stop by the espresso counter when you first arrive, order your drink and sip it while you shop. Just be sure to ditch your cup in one of the trash cans in the bulk aisle or produce before checking out!
2. Free bags of ice. Pay for one, take three! Heck, pay for none, take three! Nobody checks!
3. Free snacks for the kids. Heck, they encourage you to open packages while you shop, so have at it! Just be sure to discreetly ditch your packages with your coffee cups (see 1. above).
4. Return-o-rama! Take back your empty jars and tell the nice cashier the seal was broken and the contents were moldy. If it’s less than $10, they’ll just credit you right there, no questions, no receipt.
5. Discounts on top of discounts! Buy a case when an item is on sale, and get an additional 10% off. Now, you’re not supposesd to get the additional 10% when an item is on sale, but mostly the cashiers (especially when busy) won’t bother to check. If they do, just insist that the grocery person told you you’d get it. If there’s a line behind you, they’ll just give it to you.
August 1st, 2005 | #