Excellent Blog
2007 Inspiring Blog
Rockin' Girl Blogger

You Really Can’t Go Home Again

January 12th, 2006

Especially not when home is your former place of employment. I realize one is not supposed to blog about one’s workplace Dooce (like Deuce), but this is my former workplace.

Oh, they’re all fine, my former co-workers. Except I don’t recognize people at first, because they’re all so flippin’ old. What? When did that happen? (I’m sure I look exactly the same. Betta than evah, in the words of Etta James. Ha! Such a liar I am.) I just get a little… I dunno, bittersweet about the whole thing. The kids were fine, they were with me, and pretty sweet. Everyone was totally sweet to them, brought out toys for them to play with. They rolled around on the floor (the kids, not the former co-workers) and rassled at one point, but whatever. I coerced them with promises of vending machine food if they would behave. (Did that ever pay off for them. The cafeteria lady had chocolate bars.) They also scored two pairs of black earmuffs, from some Fox Celebrity Smackdown something, and a wind-up nun.

And this place? It’s so quiet now. Was it always that quiet? Jesus, no wonder I had such run-ins there. It’s a… guess what? Give up? World-famous newsroom, for a world-famous newspaper. Ha. World-famous if your entire world is Portland, Ore. All of this is sour grapes, this bittersweetness. Sour, bitter grapes. It made me miss working. Cuz I got asked the following questions:

“So, you’re just staying home with the kids?”

“You’re not working at all, then?”

“What does your husband do?”

“You’re just staying home with the kids, huh?”

Me: “I’m writing! For real. Sincerely. All the time. Why is it so quiet here?”

Now, let’s talk about Lost. (Spoilers ahead, if you Tivo’ed and haven’t watched it yet…) Charlie? When they flashed on his stash of nuns, it was a little chilling. But no surprise. Kick it, Charlie! You’re gonna let Claire and the baby walk? Don’t be a wanker, huh? Eko — I like Eko. Backstory is goooooooood. Are they really going to possibly give Hurley a girlfriend? Hurley needs some lovin’, and the Tailie Girl (who suddenly is glammed up like the rest of the girls), yeah, she could be the one.

Sawyer + Kate + Haircut = V. Sexy (so wifely, messing with a guy’s hair. I’m cutting Wacky Daddy’s hair as soon as he gets home.)

Poor Little DUI Girl is finally getting some friends! They gave her a fish! And My Name is Earl is on tonight. “Wakey-wakey, hands off snakey!” I love Jason Lee. Almost as much as Paul Gaustad. He’s saying, “Am I not the foxiest NHL player evah? Look at my large stick.”

All for now. Gotta get back to not working…



ps — questions for tomorrow’s advice column? Shall we do an online slambook about George Bush and have the CIA come down on our asses? Oh, wait, this domain is registered to moi.


  1. Zipdodah says

    I’m all for a “George Bush Smackdown”……
    and Wacky Mommy…….you are the hardest working woman I know……those ex co-workers are drones…

    January 15th, 2006 | #

  2. Heather says

    Hahahaha we have been walking around my house quoting “wakey wakey hands off snakey” too! I lurve me some My Name Is Earl. I so covet your TIVO. Or envy? I can never remember which one is for your neighbors ass and which one is for your neighbor’s wife? And what about your neighbor’s wife’s ass? What do you use then, oh journalist goddess?

    January 17th, 2006 | #

  3. Wacky Mommy says

    Don’t covet your neighbor’s ass; be sure to cover your ass. Sometimes I have covered my neighbor’s ass, and they always return the favor. heh heh heh heh.

    January 17th, 2006 | #

Sorry, the comment form is closed at this time.