We love chickens around here. We don’t have our own, mind you, but the neighbors do. They have three (per city ordinance: three chickens allowed, no roosters). We love other people’s chickens, would be a better way of putting it. The cats? The chickens are bigger than any of our neighborhood cats. And we have some big scrappers over here, so that is saying something. They are free-range chickens, in the truest sense. They go for several strolls every day, and they have their boundaries. Our driveway is their eastern border; the neighbor directly across the street from us is their southern border. A half-block north is their northern border. The edge of their own yard is their western border. So I wasn’t surprised this morning to hear my son ask:

“Dad, you know chickens?”

“Sure, I know chickens. What about ’em?”

“Well, one time, at Grandma’s work, this guy brought in chickens!…” Long, rambling story about chickens follows.

Now I’m thinking — Denver grandma? Iowa grandma? Portland grandma? Hmm. Who knows?

Here’s a joke from Julia Roberts — she told it to David Letterman when I saw her on his show one time. She sez: “Actually, it’s just the punchline — You have to come up with the joke.” Ready?

“You might be living off love, but you’re killing the chickens.”

happy Saturday, all of youse.

wm

“Without coffee he could not work, or at least he could not have worked in the way he did. In addition to paper and pens, he took with him everywhere as an indispensable article of equipment the coffee machine, which was no less important to him than his table or his white robe.”

— Stefan Zweigs, Biography of Balzac

“Let me say, with the risk of appearing ridiculous, that the true revolutionary is guided by strong feelings of love.” — Che Guevara

FURIOUS nads! by One True b!x

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Dear Thirteeners and All You Usual Suspects,

Do I remember how fun it is to do a Thursday Thirteen? Why, yes I do. Yes, I do, indeed. I’m copying Holly and going completely random. I mean, more random than usual. A shocker, no? Ready?

1) My daughter was in a play tonight. Two classes of third-graders, dancing and singing their hearts out. My heart may have swelled with pride; my eyes may have swelled with tears. It was pretty damn cute.

2) Afterward, we all, including Wacky Auntie and Wacky Grandma, went out for ice cream. (We used to do this when I was a kid, after my dance recitals.)

3) Everything and I mean everything is starting to bloom in our yard! Heather, tulips, lilies of the valley coming on strong, bleeding hearts, the hanging baskets, the hyacinth. My camellia. I am in love with my camellia and it’s lipstick-pink blooms. Go look at the Flickr pix my husband took. So purty.

4) Did I mention that my daughter tap-danced, sang and even had lines in the play? It made that three-day labor seem like nothing. Three days of labor was cake, considering I ended up with the sweetest daughter ever.

5) A weather report: We are here in Portland, Ore., USA. Our weather has gone something like this for the past month: Sun, rain, snow. Hail, sun, sun, sun, rain. Wind, gray, cold, rain, rain. Sun, rain, 75 degrees, hail. It’s like Mother Nature has left Heat Miser and Snow Miser in charge up there, I’m not kidding.

6) I like my new job. (Working in a school library, yay!) In fact, I like it so much I will not even discuss it because I am worried it will jinx it somehow. I love the kids, I love the books, I love the calm and chaos and thrill of seeing a kid discover a new book, a new author, a new way to look at life. Work that is satisfying is the best thing ever. Enough! No jinxes.

7) Our cats are spring-fever crazy. The birdies had better just watch out.

8) We’re ready for summer to start. How many more days of school? “Sixty-something, or fifty-something,” according to my daughter. (Yay! The kids and I will be on the same schedule for work/school.) (Still not talking about work. Not really, anyway.)

9) My husband and I are the hugest Curb Your Enthusiasm fans now. Also, I love the Wire. I’m only on the first season, though, so no spoilers, eh? It’s intense, but the writing, acting and directing are so top-notch it pays off.

10) I have a stack of fifty books to review. And no time. Kinda funny, that a librarian has no time to read. Ha. (I have been reading a bunch of contemporary kids’ lit, though. I have no idea who many of the new authors are! Leave me suggestions, y’all, in comments. Especially for titles for ages fourth grade and up.)

11) Would you like to hear the story of Super Granny? She is my daughter’s invention. She was born in 1708. That makes her THREE HUNDRED! Her best friend used to be named Little Guy Who Loves Cheese. Now her name (I know, Little Guy, you’d think “he,” but you would be wrong, dear reader) is Little Guy Who Loves Bananas. Cuz they moved to the jungle. Maybe we’ll tell you more next week…

12) Oh. You want more now? OK — Her favorite song is “Yankee Doodle.” And her favorite food is roasted pig.

13) I missed my Thursday Thirteens! Sorry I’ve been out of the loop.

Love,

WM

From Rashida Jones, April 2008, Women’s Health magazine:

A: That when we are emotional, anything that stands in our path will be destroyed. It’s like watching a volcano rip lava: Just stay away.

“love is not concerned”
by Alice Walker

“love is not concerned
with whom you pray
or where you slept
the night you ran away
from home
love is concerned
that the beauty of your heart
should kill no one.”

“Your worth is not measured by the size of your ass, nor the depth of your cleavage.”

Write that one down and stick it up on the wall.

xxox

wm

“Without coffee he could not work, or at least he could not have worked in the way he did. In addition to paper and pens, he took with him everywhere as an indispensable article of equipment the coffee machine, which was no less important to him than his table or his white robe.”

— Stefan Zweigs, Biography of Balzac

“Snip-snap, snip-snap, snip-SNAP!”
— Michael Scott, The Office

“THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID!!!”
— Michael to Jan

Private note to my kids: Sorry I was ignoring you earlier. I really needed to talk on the phone. Really. I’ll pay attention to you all weekend. We have three days. Except I’m not going to any birthday parties with you this month, only your dad is, so you’re all his for one of those afternoons. Sorry. Love, Mommy

Private note to my husband: Thanks for making dinner. Again.

Private note to my PTA friends: I find PTA challenging at times, ie always, yet I keep coming back for more.

Private note to Zip: Does that make me a masochist?

Private note to the Internets: Yesterday, the Surgeon General OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, Rear Admiral Steven K. Galson, M.D., M.P.H., shook my hand. Can you believe it?

kisses,

WM