WM sends big kisses and hugs to Wacky Mommy A, who had appendicitis (which the doctors misdiagnosed as “flu” for 24 hours — WTF????), followed by a collapsed lung?&!#$%&! Again — WTF?

Honestly, some mommies will do anything to get out of taking care of their three small children + niece + dog + cat + various contractors and responsibilities.

Please send good vibes her way, Wacky Mommies and Daddies.

WM

You know how many parents volunteer in Wacky Girl’s class, out of 28 kids? That’s right, just me. Freaking slackers. Like I want to go? No, I don’t. I’d rather watch last night’s episode of “Lost” again. (Rose… he’s alive!!!! But you knew that…) It’s raining again. I don’t even want to leave the house. Wacky Grandma has Wacky Boy today. The house is extremely quiet. I adore this.

Also, I just posted this on Amalah’s site (we were talking stretch marks).

Skin Cream Recipe for Pregnant and Post-Partum Girls

My husband, Wacky Daddy, made a nice skin cream for me (I used it throughout pregnancy and after) of 1 part cocoa butter and 2 parts coconut oil, and a small vial of Vit. E oil. I kept it in a peanut butter jar and it smelled yummy. I don’t know if it decreased the stretch marks and c-section scarring, but it made me not so itchy.

And more on my volunteer efforts (yes, that’s right, I’m kicking everyone’s ass on this today) — I just packed up about half my house and mailed it to my New Orleans friend R. Not literally half — I couldn’t figure out how to ship her our old high chair and crib, short of hiring a moving crew, but I sent her a bunch of toys, clothes, books, CDs, videos, kitchen stuff, spiral notebooks, yadda yadda. The post office gave me a discount for the boxes that were just books. Least they can do. I suggest you all do something similar. Send it c/o a friend, a relative, a friend of a friend, one of the shelters, Salvation Army, whatever. Call around and see if the Red Cross can take stuff there for you. The National Guard has been hauling backpacks with school supplies and distributing them. Call around and find out some options — It’s worth it. Send me an e if you get something going on, or just post.

Off to eat cafeteria lunch now — Terikyaki Beef Bites. Nummy! What would Emeril say?

xxox

WM

Oh. My. God. Amy and Jason just had the cutest most adorable sweetest brand new lil baby, Noah. Look at her blog and be amazed…

(it’s linked on the side, there. No, there… See it?)

xxox to them.

WM

ps okay this is funny — Wacky Boy was begging for new batteries for one of his eighteen flashlights. I swear to God, if one more person gives him a flashlight as a gift (??? is this a trend???) I will have an episode. I replaced ’em, came out of the kitchen waving it and asking, “Who’s the best mommy?” Both kids look up, confused, and ask, “Who?”

from Wacky Girl:

Okay. When we got back from swimming lessons… There used to be TWO PUMPKINS in our front yard. But then when we got back, there was only ONE. Okay. Someone stoled our pumpkin. The big one, too!

We made a sign. It said:

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okay, Wacky Mommy is in full, complete TOTAL FREAK-OUT MODE NOW! WTF? Oh. My. God…. Can’t write, can’t concentrate, can’t even manage to vacuum my g.d. office, much less work on the much-needed second draft of The Novel, because…

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1) the corn is as tall as me!

2) we can’t go to Oregon Country Fair this weekend, even though a bunch of our friends are going, but it’s raining so i don’t care, anyway, as the rain makes me “la-di-da, maybe I should build a fire in the fireplace! Oh, wait, I don’t have a fireplace…”

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Yes, this year takes the cake for this honor. A call, at 10:30 at night on my birthday, from one of my dear (???) friends, who now lives out of state, saying, “I’ve been staying at D’s for the past few days!” (D being my ex, from years and years ago. He was one of those Break Your Heart Into 100 Pieces and Kick It to The Curb types. Yes, she slept with him after we split up. And apparently, still is.)

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Have you gotten that chain e that’s been going around the last few years? It’s usually headed “And we Lived to Tell About It.” (WM has received five copies, and counting. Honest to God, if I wanted to hear a granny rant, I’d pick up the phone and call her.) The e is all about “our parents used lead paint in the nursery, and we lived,” “We got to play outside for hours — and were fine…” etc. and ends with “…kinda makes you run through the house with scissors, doesn’t it?”

No, it doesn’t, and here’s why:

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A guide to flowers:

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Check it out…

Pixieland!

http://pdxhistory.com/