I’m back to social work, after a decade of doing library and computer lab work (which is also social work, it turns out) in the K-12 schools. I’ve been in trainings, meetings, and collecting book lists for most of the summer. Here are some picks. I’m going to list out (not review) all but the first title.

“The Big Finish,” a novel by Brooke Fossey (Berkley/Penguin Random House, 2020, 326 pages, $26). Man, I love this book. First of all, I thought it was a young adult book when it arrived for review. Most of the titles I get are geared toward babies through the high school crowd. This one is a novel for the grown-ups, but I think some high schoolers would like it, too.

Duffy Sinclair and Carl Upton are best friends by happenstance — they’re well into in their 80s and both landed at the Centennial assisted living facility. It’s not that great, but it’s not that bad. They live in fear of slipping down — in their health, in their faculties, or just on the floor — and being stuck in a facility that’s not as nice. They’re worried about death, and life, when in through their window comes Josie, less than one-fourth their age. She’s possibly inebriated, she has a black eye, and she’s Carl’s granddaughter. Allegedly.

It’s a buddy story, it’s a family story, it’s about alcoholism and domestic violence and neglect, and how they impact families, individuals and all of us. It’s one of the sweetest books I’ve ever been lucky enough to read. The characters are thoroughly sketched out, the dialogue is great, and most of all, the story and the characters are believable and moving story. Highly recommended.

And now, a few titles, alphabetically by authors’ last name. I’ll keep adding to this list, it’s by no means comprehensive. Please add your suggestions in comments, if you’d like.

Alexander, Michelle, “The New Jim Crow: Mass Incarceration in the Age of Colorblindness”

Connor, Leslie, “Waiting for Normal” (young adult novel about a girl, her mother, and child neglect)

Didion, Joan, “The Year of Magical Thinking”

Giovanni, Nikki, “Collected Poetry — 1968-1998”

Goble, Jillana, “No Sugar-Coating: The Coffee Talk You Need About Foster Parenting”

Harris, Nadine Burke, “The Deepest Well: Healing the Long-Term Effects of Childhood Adversity”

Maynard, Joyce, “The Best of Us,” a memoir

Oluo, Ijeoma, “So You Want to Talk About Race”

Sanchez, Sonia, “Shake Loose My Skin: New and Selected Poems”

Sapolsky, Robert M., “Why Zebras Don’t Get Ulcers”

Tatum, Beverly Daniel, “Why Are All the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria? And Other Conversations About Race”

van der Kolk, Bessel (M.D.), “The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind and Body in the Healing of Trauma”

9/12/2020

Is the world on fire where you are? It’s on fire here in Oregon. Our little zone seems to be okay, for now, but that could change. The truck is packed, our quick bags are ready to go.

Keep us in your prayers.

I’m checking this Air Quality site compulsively. 

In my town, we’ve been hovering between “Unhealthy” and “Hazardous.” (I checked one last time before I fell asleep last night — Salem, Ore., just north of us, was off the charts, and so was Portland, Ore.) The West coast currently has the worst air quality *on the planet.* We had to be best at something, I guess.

Our air quality inside the house is okay for now, smokewise, but it was very smoky earlier in the week. And I have asthma. So there you have it. I have two inhalers next to me, and a big bottle of water.

Millions of acres lost, all along the West Coast, along with homes. The death toll is climbing. My good thoughts, prayers and anything else I’ve got, going out to the families and loved ones who have been lost or are struggling now. And there’s the Pandemic. And the civil unrest. It’s been six months today since my school district shut down and I was furloughed. I’m back to work now. Many, many thousands and millions of others have it worse than my family and friends do, but all of this is taking its toll, in small ways and large, on every single one of us. Peace and healing and rain are needed, stat.

My sister sent me this list that she got from her neighborhood Facebook group. We don’t have an air purifier and needed something. It cuts the smoke, purifies the air, makes you relax. I’m just saying, it’s working. The air is so dry and horrible, my asthma has been rough, and this has helped. Be safe, love you all.

WM

Respiratory Hack- Herbal Crock Pot Steamer

Plants often used to help with breathing/lungs include:

• Rosemary Rosmarinus officinalis
• Juniper Juniperus
• Cedar Thuja occidentalis
• Sage Salvia
• Mugwort/Sagebrush Artemisia
• Bee Balm Monarda
• Thyme
• Oregano
• Eucalyptus

My sis and I are using the handy-dandy Crockpots, but you could just as easily use a big pot of (uncovered) water on the stove. Bring to boil and then simmer, uncovered. Turn it off before you go to bed, cover it, then turn it back on again in the morning. Will be good for a couple of three days. Just keep adding more herbs, citrus and oils. I added:

Peppermint tea bags

Tea with lemon balm/chamomile

Lemon slices

And half a bag of awesome herbs from Sweet Mountaintop Farm and my dear Kate.

Any kinds of herbs are going to be nice, oregano, basil, thyme, rosemary, whatever’s on hand. Or get the store to deliver some stuff.

Pray for rain pray for rain for everywhere in the world that needs it.

(Photo by Steve Rawley)

“We are the night ocean filled
with glints of light. We are the space
between the fish and the moon,
while we sit here together.”

— Rumi

“Bottom line is we’re all flawed in this world. No one’s perfect,” film director Richard Linklater, accepting his Golden Globe award for directing, “I want to dedicate this to parents that are evolving everywhere and families that are just passing through this world and doing their best.”

I’ll see how many categories I can hit here… Ready? Ready-steady-go!

* Pacific Ocean: It’s beautiful. It makes me happy, i love my negative ions i get from the ocean, and the wildlife is so fun to watch. The sea lions in that picture are making what’s called a “raft.” They all hold onto each other and float around. Hippies :)

* Book review? Here’s what on my nightstand (and on the Kindle): Re-read “Wild,” re-reading “Torch,” re-reading Carol Shields magnum opus, “Unless,” reading “Quiet” and learning all kinds of stuff about introverts, extroverts, high reactives and the modern age, just finishing Dreiser’s “An American Tragedy,” genius, and… that’s all I can think of.

* Recipes:

Oven-Fried Spuds (excellent, best potato recipe ever)
Soup! (Steve’s recipe. This one clears up your head, fast)

1 onion, sliced thin
1 bulb garlic
2 vegetable bouillon cubes
6 cups water

Reduce water and bouillon by half to thicken.

* Work… is going well. Super well. I love working at a school (computer lab again this year), I’m with the best staff and boss in the universe (no I’m not saying that because they might read this — they really are gifted, funny, smart, wonderful with the students and everything else I was hoping for) and I love that my students are willing to work on my Spanish with me. #yohabloespanolmasomenos

* My own kids… are great. Whoever said, “Eh, you think that when they’re little they really need you, but when they’re teenagers? That’s when they really need you,” that person was so smart. (Seriously, probably 20 people said that to me when the kids were toddlers, and I thought they were joking.)

* Nekkid Neighbors — remember them?

* Sex? Not at work, people, keep that in mind, always. Or with the Nekkid Neighbors. Just a bad idea, aight? Lol. We’ve been watching Californication on Netflix, and swear to God, every time I watch it, I feel like I’ve been in an orgy, and it was kind of great, but equally horrible. Yeah.

* Speaking of pop culture… movies. We saw “Wild,” loved it, “Nebraska,” also great, “Boyhood,” one of the best movies I’ve ever seen in my life. Seriously.

* Holidays: How can 2015 be a real year? It’s so space-age sounding.

* And in the category of Pets, Stupid… Our sweet, loving, funny Wacky Cat 2 passed away last month. I keep looking for him, thinking I see him, missing him. It just sucks.

* Houses & Homes: We’re cleaning & rearranging & opposite-of-hoarding like mad right now because we’re moving again.

In five years.

But, as one of my 80-something-year-old neighbors told me after New Year’s, “Every year, I don’t know what it is. The days go slower and the years go faster.” Then he gave me a big smile, I smiled back, and he pedaled off on his bike. I know just what he means.

All for now, xo,

wm

Steve’s voters’ guide.

Dear All of My Friends Who are Campaigning for Jefferson Smith,

Please stop. Because I didn’t appreciate having to have a talk — again — with my teenage daughter about how it’s still a man’s man’s man’s world and our daughters (sisters, mothers, friends and lovers) deserve so much more. As my late, great friend Frank would say, Men like that hate women. “Get your biscuits in the oven and your buns in the bed!”

Jefferson Smith, you need to get the hell out of the race. Now. Here’s a song, dedicated just to you, sir.

“You add insult to injury/what do you get?/you get a bus stop full of honkeys that don’t ever forget”

Love,

Nancy

PS — This, this and this. For starters.

PSS — No, Charlie Hales didn’t pay me to say this. We don’t even live in Portland anymore. It’s that I am still, deep inside, a 12-year-old girl whose mama’s best friend was murdered by her abusive husband. What did the cops say, when she called them and said, “He’s threatening to kill me” ? They said, He hasn’t killed you yet.

Yeah there’s this, too.

PPSS — How is this my business? Oh, you know. I heard someone say “stupid bitch” and I assumed he was talking to me.

Edited 10/11/12 to say — Fox 12 Oregon just tweeted: Portland police and firefighters unions have withdrawn their endorsements of Portland mayoral candidate Jefferson Smith. And thank you, Mother PAC. Good.

Yeah, and along comes the 1:32 a.m. e-mail.

Edited on 10/22/12 to add: Next, we have One Ron Buel trying to smooth things over. “Character assassination” my ass. Jefferson Smith keeps shooting himself in the foot repeatedly, like Yosemite Sam gone completely berserk, and somehow the rest of us are to blame?

Look, Smith blames his victims all the time — the woman he punched, the people he assaulted and freaked out on during sports league, probably that mean ol’ traffic court for his driving record. So it’s really no surprise he is reeling, lashing out and looking for someone to blame since it doesn’t look like he’s going to be Mayor. Of anywhere. Ever. He can go be Mayor in his own head, that should work.

Yes, Ron Buel was Neil Goldschmidt’s go-to guy, for those of you who are keeping track of this crap. (Past posts we’ve written: one, two and three. And there’s this one, too.)

You know, the sociopaths, sex abusers, murderers and all the rest of the freaks in the world don’t bother me so much. There truly are more of us than there are of them. What bothers me are all the other people — the grandmas who cry, Not my boy! Not him! He’d never!; the girlfriends, wives and hangers-on who say, You don’t know him like I do, etc.; the co-workers who say, Well, that never happened to me, therefore it never happened to you…

Because those people? They just might outnumber the rest of us.

usoinvisiblewounds.org

Two simple sentences:

“Many servicemen and women returning from engagements abroad are suffering from post traumatic stress and traumatic brain injury. Learn more about PTS and TBI and where to get help with these resources.”

At least we’re talking about it. That’s a start. But this is depressing: The commercial I just saw for the USO work was immediately followed by a commercial for World of Tanks.com, a new video game. Gah. “See, kids, it’s not real…” That’s not a start. I wish people would start looking at the connections between our violent society and the violence we do in the world.

Dear Some of My Former Co-Workers,

As you are drinking yourselves silly at the wake tomorrow for our late co-worker… let’s just call him DUI Guy, for his sake… plz you will remember that alcohol isn’t the best temporary solution. But it’s a pretty good permanent one.

Love,

nancy

ps yes i know this graf needed an editor.

Here’s a related story for you.

And another one. Happy Friday, y’all. RIP, RIP, RIP to those who need it.

also, Peter Bhatia? kind of a wussy-boy. He’s all, You?! You! Are a Troll! and a… a… blogger.

oh my heck. This from the man who after he did yet another slice n dice on the newsroom, gathered us all around in an all-hands meeting, gave a big ol’ smirk and said, “The only person who likes change is a baby.” (Actually, he said that a lot. That was just the first time we ever heard it.) I told my co-workers, “This is a man who obviously has never changed a diaper.” oy.

New post from Steve.

Yeah, try covering those behinds with all four of your hands, how ’bout?

new post from Steve, writing for both of us.