“Without coffee he could not work, or at least he could not have worked in the way he did. In addition to paper and pens, he took with him everywhere as an indispensable article of equipment the coffee machine, which was no less important to him than his table or his white robe.”

— Stefan Zweigs, Biography of Balzac

One of my students was digging through the yarn basket today (I check out books! and knit with the students! This is my dream job) and found the teensiest, tiniest beetle on one of the balls of yarn. She was thrilled.

She carefully took him and re-located him outside. I love her for doing this. So, this one is for my student (and I know you’re not supposed to have favorites, but this kid is one of my favorites):

“Nothing is more humbling than to look with a strong magnifying glass at an insect so tiny that the naked eye sees only the barest speck and to discover that nevertheless it is sculpted and articulated and striped with the same care and imagination as a zebra. Apparently it does not occur to nature whether or not a creature is within our range of vision, and the suspicion arises that even the zebra was not designed for our benefit.”

— Rudolf Arnheim, psychologist and author (1904-2007)

“Do not wait for leaders; do it alone, person to person.”

— Mother Teresa

“Sweep first before your own door before you sweep the doorsteps of your neighbors.”
— Swedish proverb

I think we can all learn a little something from that quote, don’t you? It’s raining here. It won’t stop until July. Stupid Portland, Oregon, why do I love and hate you in equal portions?

Internets, my kids are getting older. They’re not really liking my spilling my guts to the Internets. This poses a problem because… I blog. I stress, therefore I blog. Also it clears my head. Also you guys always are supportive and have good ideas, or at least offer to crack heads for me. Or bring me some crack. Or at least commit to getting up at the crack of dawn to see if I’ve posted.

That goes a long way with me.

People I attend meetings with, in real life, are not willing to go so far. They are willing to insult my knitting, though. Who would insult someone’s knitting, for pete’s sake? I knit nicely. It’s pretty, my knitting. Do not be rude, you meeting people. You could try bringing me candy, and saying, “Nice scarf!” and “Wow, you teach kids to knit every week? And the customers and owners of the Naked Sheep Knit Shop donate a ton of stuff to the kids? Fantastic! That is so cool of them! Can I learn, too?”

It’s a nice fantasy world, up there in my head. Some people have been really sweet about my knitting classes. Almost everyone, in fact. Just the handful that were rude stand out. I will now shove their comments out the door, sweep them off my steps, and be done with them. I will only remember the people who said, “Excellent work.”

The glow of working outside the home has worn off, by the by. I do not care for meetings so much, it turns out. And yes, Lelo, I’ve turned into a “Meeting Knitter.” Because I can, that’s why. Also, I ate the Girl Scout cookies I was saving for you. (See: Stress, meetings, parenthood, weather, above.) I’ll bake something for you to make up for it. It had to be done, my apologies.

Also, I do not have to worry about getting dooced here because, contrary to public opinion, I AM NOT GETTING PAID. Maybe someday.

So… let’s say someone at your house has started getting insanely hormonal and random, and let’s say that for a change, that someone is not me. (Not that I’m calm and non-hormonal, oh no, I’m just not as hormonal as someone else here is.)

The advice I was given was:

“Hormones are normal and they get worse then better, then worse, then better. This goes on for several years, like 20. I suggest that you start drinking heavily now or abusing prescription drugs like Xanax, Valium, Ativan, or the like. Painkillers work well, and especially work well mixed with alcohol–but DON’T mix them with alcohol AND any of the aforementioned drugs and anti-depressants or you could end up like Heath Ledger.

Just sayin’.”

Can you top that? I don’t think so, but please try, anyway. Ativan makes me puke, but I will consider the other combos. JUST KIDDING in case my mom is reading this.

Happy Friday to y’all.

“Words are loaded pistols.”

— Jean-Paul Sartre, writer and philosopher (1905-1980)

“Writing the last page of the first draft is the most enjoyable moment in writing. It’s one of the most enjoyable moments in life, period.”

— Nicholas Sparks, author (1965- )

“One must be drenched in words, literally soaked in them, to have the right ones form themselves into the proper patterns at the right moment.” — Hart Crane, poet (1899-1932)

“Evil is like a shadow – it has no real substance of its own, it is simply a lack of light. You cannot cause a shadow to disappear by trying to fight it, stamp on it, by railing against it, or any other form of emotional or physical resistance. In order to cause a shadow to disappear, you must shine light on it.”

— Shakti Gawain, teacher and author (b. 1948)

“If a man would register all his opinions upon love, politics, religion, learning, etc., beginning from his youth and so go on to old age, what a bundle of inconsistencies and contradictions would appear at last!”

— Jonathan Swift, satirist (1667-1745)

“It is difficult/
to get the news from poems/
yet men die miserably every day/
for lack/
of what is found there”

— William Carlos Williams