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Repo Man, Emilio!

December 19th, 2006

Emilio,

May we have a word, Emilio? “Bobby”? “BOBBY”? No. No, no, no, no, no. Repo Man. And in case you’ve forgotten it, here’s a hunk of dialogue:

Otto: You eat a lot of acid Miller, back in the hippie days?

Miller: I’ll give you another instance. You know the way everybody’s into weirdness right now? Books in all the supermarkets about Bermuda triangles, UFO’s, how the Mayans invented television. That kind of thing?

Otto: I don’t read them books.

Miller: Well, the way I see it it’s exactly the same. There ain’t no difference between a flying saucer and a time machine. People get so hung up on specifics. They miss out on seeing the whole thing. Take South America for example. In South America thousands of people go missing every year. Nobody knows where they go. They just like disappear. But if you think about it for a minute, you realize something. There had to be a time when there was no people. Right?

Otto: Yeah. I guess.

Miller: Well, where did all these people come from? Hmmm? I’ll tell you where. The future. Where did all these people disappear to? Hmmm?

Otto: The past?

Miller: That’s right! And how did they get there?

Otto: How the fuck do I know?

Miller: Flying saucers. Which are really? Yeah, you got it. Time machines. I think a lot about this kind of stuff. I do my best thinking on the bus. That’s how come I don’t drive, see?

Otto: You don’t even know how to drive.

Miller: I don’t want to know how. I don’t want to learn. See? The more you drive, the less intelligent you are.

“You Must Remember This…”

December 13th, 2006

“A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous.”

–Ingrid Bergman

Recipe Club: Playdough Recipe, Ornaments, and Papier-Mache

December 11th, 2006

From George Bernard Shaw:

“This is the true joy of life: the being used up for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one; being a force of nature instead of a feverish, selfish little clot of ailments and grievances, complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy.”

Yeah, that’s me alright — a regular force of nature. And this may be all you’re getting from me this week…

Book of the week: I Feel Bad About My Neck: And Other Thoughts on Being A Woman by Nora Ephron. She is a funny, funny, funny lady. Sorry, I could never hope to be even one-tenth as funny as she is, so I will not try.

Christmas pageants are a lot of work, it turns out. If I was into pharmaceuticals I’d be taking a Valium right now.

(more…)

Bong Hits for Jesus

December 1st, 2006

See this. And have a happy weekend! We’re decorating the tree, listening to “Here Comes Suzy Snowflake” and baking chocolate chip cookies.

It’s a Winter Fucking Wonderland over here, to quote Wacky Grandpa.

Yeah, It’ll Be a Real Vacation, All Right

November 30th, 2006

“Maybe next time I see you I’ll have a little one strapped to my chest. I’m looking forward to it — I really need a vacation from work. I’m taking three weeks paternity leave.”

— dad to dad, overheard by WM at Sohbet Coffeehouse

“Oh Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas Tree…”

November 30th, 2006

“I know nobody likes me. Why do we have to have a holiday season to emphasize it?”

— Charlie Brown

That’s What I’m Saying!

November 29th, 2006

“Too many people spend money they haven’t earned, to buy things they don’t want, to impress people they don’t like.”

— Will Rogers, humorist (1879-1935)

Heh Heh Heh Heeeeeee

November 19th, 2006

So you all know my husband, the inimitable Hockey God. He found the funniest new blog — Overheard In PDX.

Here are my two favorites so far:

Put it on lay-away

Girl #1 (In Massage Chair): “Do you think I could marry this thing?”

Girl #2 (Standing in front of her): “Maybe, but it would leave after you whored around with the shower massager.”

– Pioneer Square inside of Sharper Image
— Overheard by Jay

Pennyless is Timelessness
Teenager: “Dude, can you spare some change?”

Man: “Sure, kid.”

Teenager: “Thanks, that’s cool. So, how’s it going for you today?”

Man: “What can I say? It’s Friday.”

Teenager (bugeyed): “It’s Friday? Oh man, I am so screwed.”

– Blue Moon Cafe
— Overheard by Rich

(PS — If you want to read about our Disney on Ice experience, go look at Hockey God’s blog.)

Happy Sunday, everyone!

WM

Writing Quotes of the Day

November 18th, 2006

From Aldous Huxley: “I met, not long ago, a young man who aspired to become a novelist. Knowing that I was in the profession, he asked me to tell him how he should set to
work to realize his ambition. I did my best to explain. ‘The first thing,’ I said, ‘is to buy quite a lot of paper, a bottle of ink, and a pen. After that you merely have to write.'”

From Steve Martin: “I think I did pretty well, considering I started out with nothing but a bunch of blank paper.”

(more…)

A Blog With A View

October 24th, 2006

Because nothing says “Tuesday” like a Gandhi quote:

“Seven blunders of the world that lead to violence: wealth without work, pleasure without conscience, knowledge without character, commerce without morality, science without humanity, worship without sacrifice, politics without principle.”

— Mahatma Gandhi (1869-1948)

No recipes today, sorry. But here is a good article for you to read:

Rosie O’D on The View, by one Melanie McFarland.

It’s a good article. But I’m wondering, why are they (the network execs) not offering us our own TV show? We are coffee-klatching like crazy here. Can you imagine a roundtable with Our Lady of Amalah, Dooce, Zoot, and Rockstar Mommy? Round it out with an international perspective from Planet Nomad and a fiction writer like Leslie Gould (mom of four, military wife, active in community and still finds time to do her art). I could bring everyone coffee; I choke on-camera. Also, I develop nervous tics, or I stare at the red light like Cindy Brady.

Anyway — splendid idea, no? I guess physically getting everyone in the same room would present a little bit of a challenge.

It’s raining here. How is it there?

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