“Life is a train of moods like a string of beads; and as we pass through them they prove to be many colored lenses, which paint the world their own hue, and each shows us only what lies in its own focus.”
— Ralph Waldo Emerson

Pet peeve: When someone says, I’m only playing devil’s advocate, only they are screaming it at you and not taking time to even attempt to hear where you’re coming from. No, you’re not “pretending” to give me someone else’s opinion, as some cat-and-mouse “devil’s advocate” thing (more…)

Last week my grandma informed me that she was going to stop eating. And taking her medicine. And, eventually, living.

Then along came a platter of bacon. And the Cold War. (more…)

My mom bakes the best cookies ever — chocolate chip, chocolate crinkle, chocolate drop cookies. Pretty much anything from the chocolate food group.

Refrigerator cookies, snickerdoodles, molasses cookies, the other molasses cookies, both delicious, etc. But these are the deluxe cookies:

RAINBOW WALNUT SLICES

1 cup margarine
1 ¾ cups granulated sugar
2 eggs
2 teaspoons vanilla
3 cups sifted flour
1 ¼ teaspoons salt
½ teaspoon baking powder
red and green food coloring
¼ cup quartered candied red cherries
1 ½ cups chopped walnuts
¼ cup quartered green cherries
1 ounce square unsweetened chocolate, melted
2 tablespoons finely chopped candied ginger (optional

350° 8 to 10 minutes

Cream together butter, sugar, eggs and vanilla.
Sift flour with salt and baking powder, blend into creamed mixture.
Divide dough into thirds.
Tint one portion pink, blend in red cherries and ½ cup walnuts.
Pack in even layer in waxed paper lined loaf pan (8 ½ x 4 ½ x 2 ½).
Tint second portion light green and mix in ½ cup walnuts and green cherries.
Blend melted chocolate into remaining dough and mix in walnuts and ginger.
Pack chocolate portion evenly over pink layer and top with green.
Cover pan and chill in freezer.
To bake, remove loaf of dough from pan and slice thin.
Cut slices in halves and place on cookie sheet one inch apart.

APRICOT PASTRIES

2 cups dried apricots
2 cups water
3 cups sifted all-purpose flour
1 tablespoon sugar
½ teaspoon salt
1 cup shortening
½ cup milk
1 package active dry yeast
1 slightly beaten egg
½ teaspoon vanilla

OVEN 350 degrees

Simmer apricots in water until tender. Cool. Sift together flour, sugar, and salt; cut in shortening till mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Scald milk; cool to warm; add yeast and let soften. Add egg and vanilla. Add to flour mixture; mix well.

Divide dough in four parts. On a surface well dusted with confectioners’ sugar, roll one part at a time to 10-inch square. Cut each in sixteen 2 ½-inch squares; place heaping teaspoon of apricots in center of each. Pinch two opposite corners together.

Place two inches apart on greased cooky sheet. Let stand 10 minutes. Bake at 350 degrees about 10 to 12 minutes. Remove at once from pan; roll in confectioners’ sugar. Cool on rack.

Makes 64 pastries.

I’ll write the reviews tomorrow (or possibly Tuesday) and give you some recipes, but wanted you to see what I’ve been reading this weekend. (Along with Harry Potter 3, yay Harry Potter. Now I can see why everyone has been waiting in lines all these years for him.)

Happy Sunday, babies!

Recommended:

edited to add this:

Ayun’s book is funny. She’s a funny girl. She’s especially funny when she’s describing how her father stole her Betty Crocker’s New Boys and Girls Cook Book from her after her parents divorced. To my own father I would like to say, Peace, Dad. You killed yourself, you killed my dog, you left us alone. You left me longing for something I would never have. Ever. You wrecked my life in a lot of ways, but at least you never stole my favorite cook book so you could have the hamburger recipe like Ayun’s dad. For that small favor, I thank you.

(Also, you will find the delicious recipe for “Ham” Loaf Hawaiian, the first meal I ever cooked for my mom, dad and sis, on page 68, under the “Meats canned meat” section of the Betty Crocker book. I know because I just picked up my copy off the shelf and thumbed through it. I was also fond of making the Mad Hatter Meatballs on the opposite page. And the bunny salad. There is a lot of Internet love out there for this book, by the way. Ayun and I are not alone. Here’s someone who wrote a book about “Ham” Loaf Hawaiian.)

Here’s a good one from her book. I’ve already made these three times. I didn’t have chocolate chips, so I subbed sweetened cocoa. Good… but they’re not chocolate chips. Give it a try, and don’t blame me if you eat the entire pan.

gub-gub brownies
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Melt 2 sticks of butter. Sweet Jesus.

Then add 2 cups of brown sugar, 2 eggs and 2 teaspoons of vanilla.

Better taste some to make sure nobody poisoned it.

Thank God you’re still alive to add 1 1/2 cups of flour, 2 teaspoons of baking powder and 1 teaspoon of salt.

Discuss boys for 5 to 10 minutes to give the dough a chance to cool off a little.

Add 2 cups of chocolate chips. (But first, as a favor to me, do a little Internet research to see which brand is owned by a conglomerate that gladhands its infant formula to impoverished families in developing countries in order to create “customers” who can ill afford a product they didn’t need in the first place and now mix with dirty water. Then buy another brand.)

Don’t forget to discuss those boys, though. Remember, the Internet didn’t exist back when I was in high school. I wouldn’t have known an instant message if it bit me in the ass.

Pour in a greased 9″ x 13″ pan and bake for 30-40 minutes.

These suckers have a long shelf life, so mail them to all your friends who have already left for college.

(from “Dirty Sugar Cookies”)

I got nothing. Have hit wall re: cooking. Between the vegetarian thing (husband and kids), the whining (kids. “Mac and cheese. We only like mac and cheese! That’s the wrong kind of yogurt!”), the sheer monotony… I got nothing.

Will search. (more…)

What time is it where you are? Ready for drinkies? I am going to have a glass of red wine, and we can talk. ‘K? K. (It’s a Bonterra Merlot. Niiiiiiiiiiiiiice. Thank you, R from Seattle and Chicago.)

“Don’t drink and drink.”
— Wacky Mommy

I am having a life chock-full of fun over here, Internets. Cleaning, cooking, ironing. Working, picking up kids, shopping. Sleeping? Exercising? Working, putting off my online class ’til October. We have the garden to harvest, the patio furniture to bring in and let’s not even talk about the political season and the conversations I have been having with various political types who show up on my porch.

Me: “It’s a private vote.”
Them: “Would you mind telling us how you would vote, were you to vote today?”
Me: “It’s a private vote. We vote privately in this country.”
Them, walking away: “Jeez, a lot of anger!” (more…)

We just had this for dinner and it was soooooooo good. We served it with tzatziki that I whipped up (shredded cuke, plain yogurt, garlic, salt and lime juice), instead of the sour cream dressing. We also used Alexis Pita Bread. We made the sandwiches with slices of onion and tomato, and shredded lettuce, but the salad they suggest here sounds yummy, as well.

Bon appetit!

wm

Santa Fe Falafel

From Redbook
This recipe has been tested by Redbook and Chez Wacky

INGREDIENTS
1 can(s) (15-ounce) Anasazi or pinto beans, rinsed, drained
1/2 cup(s) shredded reduced-fat pepper-jack cheese
1/2 cup(s) baked tortilla chips, finely crushed
3 scallions, minced
1/4 cup(s) finely chopped red bell pepper
1/4 cup(s) chopped cilantro
1 clove(s) garlic, crushed through a press
1 1/2 teaspoon(s) chili powder
1 teaspoon(s) salt
1 large egg white
8 (4 1/2-inch) whole-wheat pitas, top third cut off
8 slice(s) (thin) red onion
8 slice(s) (thin) plum tomato
1 cup(s) shredded romaine lettuce
1/3 cup(s) reduced-fat sour cream
1/2 teaspoon(s) lime zest, mixed with above sour cream
1 teaspoon(s) lime juice, mixed with above sour cream

Accompaniment: Carrot, Radish, and Grapefruit Salad

DIRECTIONS

1. Place beans in a medium bowl and mash with a fork until a coarse puree forms. Add cheese, tortilla chips, scallions, bell pepper, cilantro, garlic, chili powder, salt, and egg white; stir until well combined. Shape 1/4 cupfuls into 8 (3-inch) patties.
2. Spray a nonstick griddle or large skillet with olive oil cooking spray and heat over medium heat. Cook falafel 2 to 3 minutes per side, until browned and heated through.
3. Place a falafel in each pita with a slice each of onion and tomato, and shredded lettuce. Serve with lime sour cream and Carrot, Radish, and Grapefruit Salad.

Carrot, Radish, and Grapefruit Salad (also from Redbook)

INGREDIENTS
2 1/2 cup(s) shredded carrot
6 radishes, thinly sliced
2 red grapefruit, peeled and cut into segments
2 tablespoon(s) snipped fresh chives
1/4 teaspoon(s) salt
1/4 teaspoon(s) freshly ground pepper

DIRECTIONS

1. Combine all ingredients along with the juice squeezed from the leftover grapefruit membranes.

My son informed me this morning that I should quit eating meat. I informed him no, I shouldn’t, since I’ve gained 20 pounds being a mostly-vegetarian. (The occasional turkey sandwich, fish or chicken sometimes when we dine out.) I just lost 13 pounds, thank God, because I am not happy about this.

His sister last week told me to not eat fish.

“What about trout?” she asked. “Would you eat trout?”

“I would eat the hell out of some trout,” I told her. “Right after I caught it and smacked it on the head with a rock.”

“Yeah! Well, how would you feel if someone hit you in the head with a rock?” she asked.

Some days I’d be fine with that. As long as they knocked me quickly unconscious.

Meat isn’t murder. Cheese and sour cream are murder. Meat keeps me skinny. This recipe, however, is not what I have in mind (thanks anyway, Ms. Zip. I’m sure you’ll be whipping up this one lovingly for your family tonight):

No Foolin’ Sausage Cake
Makes 16 servings

1 pound pork sausage
1-1/2 cups brown sugar
1-1/2 cups granulated sugar
2 eggs, lightly beaten
3 cups sifted all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon ground ginger
1 teaspoon pumpkin pie spice
1 cup cold strong coffee
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 cup raisins
1 cup chopped nuts

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Grease and flour a 9-inch tube pan. Combine sausage and sugars and beat well. Add eggs and mix well.

Sift together flour, baking powder, ginger and pumpkin pie spice. Stir baking soda into coffee. Add flour and coffee mixtures alternately to sausage mixture stirring well to combine. Let raisins stand 5 minutes in boiling water. Drain well and stir into the batter with nuts.

Spoon into prepared tube pan, spreading evenly. Bake for 1-1/2 hours or until a cake tester inserted into the center of the cake comes out clean. Turn out of the tube pan and cool on a wire rack. Serve warm or at room temperature. Refrigerate any leftover cake.

“I am really looking forward as I get older and older to being less and less nice.” — Annette Bening

And…

Sparkling Sangria Simplified

——————————————————————————–

Serving Size : 6-8 servings.

1 Cup Arbor Mist Sangria Zinfandel
1 Cup Champagne

Garnish with fruit.

Mix, serve, enjoy.

(From Hungrymonster)

Happy Friday, y’all!!! Have to get ready for the weekend — my husband has some mysteries planned. I am scared. Ha ha ha.

nancy

From Family Fun Cooking with Kids…

for Miss Nan, who is vacationing Down de Islands.

We love this kids’ cookbook best of all (and we have a fairly sizable collection, so we are Quite the Experts over here). My daughter went through and put stickies on every recipe she wanted to make. Would have been faster for her to mark the ones she wasn’t interested in. Heh heh. (Homemade ravioli was excellent, as were Pizza Mummies and “grilled cheese sandwiches” made out of toasted slices of poundcake and frosting tinted yellow. Up next are Popovers, Skillet Lasagna and — I’m hoping, anyway — Asparagus Salad with Sweet Pepper Confetti. Oh, wait. That one isn’t marked).

We subbed plain yogurt for the sour cream, and buttermilk for the plain milk and yum. We left out the nuts, cos while we are nuts, we do not care for nuts. It turned out super-fine. Bon appetit!

From their helpful website (honestly, whatever did I do before Thee Internet?)…

Streusel Coffee CaKe

Moist, buttery, and packed inside and out with brown sugar streusel, this coffee cake is as versatile as it is delicious. You can keep individually wrapped slices in the freezer ready to pop in a brown bag lunch for school, a hike, or a holiday road trip. The recipe itself is short and sweet, but it’s still a great one for aspiring bakers, with lots of measuring, mixing, and other fun cooking jobs.

RECIPE INGREDIENTS:
Cinnamon Crunch Topping
1 1/2 cups pecans or walnuts
1/3 cup packed light brown sugar
2 tablespoons flour
1 teaspoon cinnamon
3 tablespoons cold unsalted butter, cut into pieces

Sour Cream Cake
2 3/4 cups flour
2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 cup unsalted butter, softened
1 3/4 cups sugar
3 large eggs, at room temperature
1 teaspoon grated lemon zest
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
3/4 cup sour cream
1/2 cup milk

Sweet Glaze
1 1/4 cups confectioners’ sugar
2 tablespoons milk
1. Butter a 9- by 13-inch cake pan. Dust the pan with flour and remove the excess by turning the pan upside down and tapping the bottom. Heat the oven to 350 degrees.

2. To prepare the Cinnamon Crunch Topping, first coarsely chop the nuts, or have your child put them in a sealable plastic bag and lightly tap them with a rolling pin to break them into pieces. Then combine the nuts, brown sugar, flour, and cinnamon in a bowl, using clean hands to mix the ingredients. Cut in the butter with a pastry cutter until the mixture resembles coarse crumbs.

3. To make the Sour Cream Cake, sift the flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt into a medium bowl and set it aside. Using an electric mixer, preferably a large stand mixer, cream the butter on medium-high speed, gradually adding the sugar. Add the eggs one at a time, beating well after each addition. Add the lemon zest and vanilla extract and blend briefly.

4. Whisk together the sour cream and milk. Mix about a third of the mixture into the creamed ingredients until smooth. Then blend in about a third of the flour mixture. Continue alternately beating in the liquid and dry ingredients by thirds.

5. Spread half the batter in the prepared pan. Evenly sprinkle half the topping on it, pressing it lightly into the batter. Spread the remaining batter evenly over the topping. Then cover that layer with the remaining topping. Bake the coffee cake on the center oven rack for about 40 minutes, until nicely browned. A toothpick inserted at the center should come out clean. Place the pan on a wire rack and let the cake cool completely.

6. For the glaze, combine the confectioners’ sugar and milk in a large bowl and whisk until smooth and suitable to drizzle. If needed, you can make the glaze thinner or thicker by adding a little more milk or sugar, respectively. Use a spoon to drizzle the glaze on the cooled coffee cake. Makes 12 or more servings.