What kind of monster are you?

Oh, if only I had a nickel for every time someone has asked me that.

(Thanks, Mama Pajama.)

(And no, I won’t tell you what kind of monster I am. Apparently one that “plays well with vampires.”)

(Did you know this is post #800 for me? That’s insane, Internet.)

New post over at Grasshopper. Today’s discussion: Suburbs vs. exurbs vs. inner city. Whaddya think?

From e-mail I received from MomsRising. (Would you like to buy T-shirts from them and support the cause? Click here.)

Dear MomsRising Member,

Breaking News: Congress voted today (Oct. 18, 2007) on the State Children’s Health Insurance Program (SCHIP), but didn’t gain the 2/3 majority needed to overturn the President’s veto. Now, we have another chance. In the coming weeks Congress will bring children’s health insurance to the President again — and they need our support.

With 1 in 8 children in our nation living without any heathcare coverage, we still have work to do. The good news is that your more than 60,000 emailed letters to Congress, along with the work of our partner organizations, helped build the support that made the vote close enough to try again.

TELL CONGRESS TO KEEP UP THE GOOD FIGHT: Sign our NEW petition to tell Congress: “Children’s health care is a top priority. Bring the expanded State Children’s Health Insurance Program (SCHIP) to the finish line. The members of Momsrising.org thank those in Congress who have led the way on this issue, and support their continued leadership. We also urge those who voted against the bill to rethink their positions.”

*Click here to add your name to our petition. This petition will be delivered directly to each and every member of Congress. The more signatures we get, the more powerful this petition will be.

ASK YOUR FRIENDS TO SIGN THE PETITION TOO: Petitions grow by one signature at a time, and every signature matters. Do you have a friend (or ten) who you shares your sense of outrage at the President’s veto and Congress’ inability to overrule it this time? This is the moment, right now, to forward this email to them.

*Don’t forget to sign the petition and pass it on.

We can do it! –Katie, Kristin, Mary, Ashley, Amy, and the MomsRising Team

P.S. In case you need some facts to inspire you, here are a few reasons the SCHIP program is so important (and great facts for your rally signs!):
*12% of American Children don’t have any insurance coverage at all
* The U.S. Ranks 37th in the world for infant mortality
* One-in-five U.S. jobs does not provide health insurance, a pension, or wages high enough to support a family
* For a family of 4, one year of health insurance costs an average of $11,000
* Over 1/2 of all bankruptcy filings in 2001 were a result of medical expenses

P.P.S. Here are a few articles about Congress’ vote.
CNN
NY Times

-Your donations make the work of MomsRising possible. To donate today on our new, secure website go here.

I got picked as a Sweet Treat by Natalie of State of Confusion. This made my day.

Hey Natalie — thank you!

“The Song of Wandering Aengus”
William Butler Yeats

I went out to the hazel wood,
Because a fire was in my head,
And cut and peeled a hazel wand,
And hooked a berry to a thread;
And when white moths were on the wing,
And moth-like stars were flickering out,
I dropped the berry in a stream
And caught a little silver trout.

When I had laid it on the floor
I went to blow the fire aflame,
But something rustled on the floor,
And some one called me by my name:
It had become a glimmering girl
With apple blossom in her hair
Who called me by my name and ran
And faded through the brightening air.

Though I am old with wandering
Through hollow lands and hilly lands,
I will find out where she has gone,
And kiss her lips and take her hands;
And walk among long dappled grass,
And pluck till time and times are done
The silver apples of the moon,
The golden apples of the sun.

(from Poets Corner)

You are a big liar, junk mail folder, with your one thousand e-mails in my junk mail trap every day of my life.

I do not believe there are four girls waiting to meet me.

I do not believe you will make my penis stronger. I do not have a penis.

I do not believe that your watches are “all that” or that Viagra is the answer to my problems (see above: no penis), or that you are “freaking cheap,” although I do believe you are a “freak.” I would not do ritalin and drink, although according to you I can and buy some lexapro for good measure and call it a day.

(Customer service girl at Fred Meyer store, after telling an out-of-state caller, No we don’t sell hard liquor here: “He just needs to get himself a hard lemonade and call it a night.”)

I do not want your meds program, your depression seroquel or your protonix side effects. I do not care about Zoloft, synthroid or ativan side effects.

I know the synthroid side effects, having been on it since I was a child of 14. Its side effect is: I’m alive and not going into cardiac arrest.

I do not want 100 milligrams of this or that or something COD or something for free or all the help I need right here right now.

I am tired of telling my children, “Don’t look, junk mail!” even though I have selected text only no pix so I no longer have to see the big dix. My daughter reads now, and my son is learning. I do not want them to meet you.

You go away now, junk mail, before I slap ya.

ps — All the testosterone I need? No thanks. It’s estrogen here and I’ve got plenty.

From Natalie at State of Confusion, who I found through Vixen!

Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Cookies

1 c oil
3 c sugar
2 eggs
1 lg can pumpkin
2 t baking soda
2 t baking powder
2 t cinnamon
1 t all spice/1 t cinnamon mixed
1/2 t ginger
5 c flour
1 t salt

Mix all together with milk chocolate chips. Bake at 350 degrees for 13-15 minutes.

Hockey God, on his way out of the room, tells me, “I’ll see you in bed.”

Then says to Wacky Cat One, “I’ll see you in Hell.”

What should I do with my life? Let’s ask my Google ads, here they come now!

* Christian boarding school (uh. probably not)
* Teen counselor (a clue for who I’ll be calling in the future?)
* House values (sure. what are they if you don’t want to install new carpet, remodel the kitchen and upstairs bath and add patios?)
* Oregon house values (you know me so well, Google)
* Home appreciation rates (according to the realtors, you don’t have to have much money to buy a house in Portland! that’s news to the rest of us)

I was mean about it when the Florida Room moved in. You know, I was all, just what Jefferson High School needs — a bar across the street.

They even had some protesters from Jeff and elsewhere in the neighborhood show up at one point. (The “Church of the Bloody Mary” sign did come down, which many of us appreciated.)

But when the shootings happened, after the Jeff football game, homecoming and dance on Friday? Who was the first out on the street? The EMT-trained kitchen staff from the Florida Room. (BlackFriend left a note in comments). She says, “They wanted to make sure the kids were all right.”

That touches the heart of even a bitchy cynic like myself.

Thanks, you guys.