End of August means hello, rain! I haven’t missed you much the last two months. Guess we’ll be hanging out again ’til end of June 2007. Nice to know you, summer. See ya later. For my Thursday Thirteen I bring you…
THIRTEEN MONTHS OF RAIN IN OREGON
1. August sprinkles = Do I bring laundry in off line? Yes? No? No = It keeps raining. Yes = the sun comes out.
2. September drizzle = Yes, bring laundry in permanently. And patio chair cushions too. And the kids’ easel. And the camp chairs I forgot were out there.
3. October spitting rain = You’re at the Oregon coast. Sorry, no one told you the rain stings here? Welcome!
4. November downpour = raincoats, boots, cotton pants that get soaked. Jeans that get soaked. Dog who gets soaked and stands there looking miserable. Cats who laugh at dog and make him feel more insecure then he already is.
5. December rain = Dang it, when will it stop raining? Basement is flooding again, even though I thought that hole was patched. Are the gutters full? We just cleaned them out. Why can it never snow here for Christmas? Kids: “Mommy, will Santa be able to fly in the rain? I thought his sled needed snow?” Me: “Santa’s fine. Go back to bed.”
6. January sideways rain = This is why no one here carries an umbrella. The rain blows in sideways, so what is the point? I love my Columbia parka.
7. More January rain = I need to re-waterproof my Columbia parka cuz it is soaked through.
8. And still more January rain + cold temps = the Wackies, ice skating in their driveway. (We did, for real. I have the videotape to prove it. It was so cool. But when Hockey God skated off down the street, and around the block? That, my friends, was the coolest. That was the second or third day of being stuck inside. By day six, nothing was fun anymore. Not even Trike Races in the Kitchen.)
9. Big downpour rain in February = Remember that week of nice weather earlier in the month, and you said smarmily, “See? We sometimes have a nice spring in Portland. It doesn’t always rain.” You were fooled again by our girl Mother Nature.
10. Gusty winds and rain in March = Why did I wear this white T-shirt that is now see-through (peekaboo!) and forget my rain jacket? Why does it always rain here? Why does it always rain all week during spring break? Want. To. Cry. Now.
11. April showers = May flowers. Flowers! Pretty. Nice. Sunshine, yes?
12. May flowers need more rain, apparently. May comes in like a lion and goes… oh, wait. That’s March.
13. June rain = Rose Festival! It’s a festival… with rides! Three parades (Starlight/Kiddie/Grand)! And sailors! Sailors impregnating local girls! We’re all hap-hap-happy. So no rain, right? Just sunshine and dreamy summer nights, right? Ha. See you in July, summer!