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the Daily Bitch

August 23rd, 2010

From my desk calendar, Aug. 21-22, 2010: “I went to college for this?”

Hahahahaha… wait. That’s not funny. But I am. I am your Daily Bitch. Only lately it’s not daily, is it, you poor lil deprived things. Sorry. I’m busy! Watering the yard takes up a lot of time.

I started my new job. My boss is great. Generally I don’t blog about work because, you know. Dooce. (Or as I like to call her, “My little Doocey-woocey.”) You know her, the founder of the expression: “Be ye not so stupid.” Well, who’s laughing now, Internet? Dooce writes about work all day long.

So. With that little disclaimer out of the way… My boss is v. cool. She is Cool 7.0, or possibly Cool 10.0 and I am looking forward to this school year. As my old roommate used to say, “If anyone deserves to be happy, it’s me.” My response, “No, me!” Him: “Me!!!!” etc.

Also I found a ton of new books (including a crateful donated by my Wacky Kids) and I spent the whole day getting the books into the database, bar-coded, with fresh jackets and their little ID stamps, “Property of Wacky Mommy’s New School.” And a fair amount of tape was involved. Mostly I went into liberry work so I can play with tape, stampers and kids all day. Not in that order. The stampers probably are the most critical component for me. Ha! I jest! I’m in it for the love bucks from the students, pure and simple.

So. What’s up, Internet? How’s my girls? And guy? What you may or may not know about me is that I take copious notes. I have hypergraphia, I’m pretty sure. My notepad of choice: My left hand.

Right now it says:

hamster fud
charge Netbook
prom. note

That’s right! Cuz in addition to going back to work today (after more than 2 long, glorious months spent in the garage, sorting through my grandma’s china, my other grandma’s “Arkansas Crystal” and… if you haven’t read this post yet, you should, cuz it really sums up my mom’s side of The Family…

(My daughter, “Mom, are you going anywhere with this?”) (Yes, I am.) (Seriously, that’s her new line, she kills me.)

I start grad school on Wednesday. Any school, any place, any time, they should just type a little note at the bottom of the first letter they send you, and that note should say:

plz bring your checkbook!

So I am taking out loans, and a Promissory Note is in order. Hmm. Can I promise what I’ll give them if we re-neg?

* Arkansas Crystal
* the “good slides”
* the 20-year-old truck. It’s paid for!
* and I’ll bake them some Mexican wedding cakes and a Chocolate Volcano Cake.

That should do it, don’t you think?


your friend,



  1. Winn says

    Sounds like that should do it! Best of luck to you in 1. new job, and 2. grad school. Ever hear of “pacing yourself”? It’s a real thing, yo. Check it out. ;) I know, I know: work is play to you because of the stampers and kids (but don’t stamp the kids for cryin’ out loud), but still, take it easy eh? All that extra work watering the lawn could knock you right out. Take care of you. Mwahhhh!

    August 23rd, 2010 | #

  2. Dan Hortsch says

    I was going to ask if you are going anywhere with this, but by the end, I decided not to be a jerk and say, instead: Obviously, WM, you are going places. And doing great things along the way and when you get there. Okay, that’s kind of sloppy, but beneath that witty, sometimes smart talk exterior lies a great mother and librarian and, I presume, wife. Sorry to not be definite on that last matter; he hasn’t called me to complain in six or eight weeks, but I don’t want to speculate. (Seriously, another thoughtful and enjoyable and informative blog. I hate the word blog, but I have to get used to it.)

    August 23rd, 2010 | #

  3. Ralphie says

    Best of luck, lady, in your new skool year! And grad skool, too? You gonna be busy! Hey, did you see the new Mommy line of really FUNNY cards and gift items at Hallmark? Ma usually doesn’t buy cards there, but she was impressed with their MOM line, cute! Go see, you might need an item…

    August 23rd, 2010 | #

  4. Nan says

    Chocolate Volcano cake is totally happenin’ here too this week!

    I just handed the family crystal over to my sister, because it’s more ‘Her’. Y’know? Except for Aunt Olga’s wineglasses, which are in a box somewhere. Will find them eventually!

    August 24th, 2010 | #

  5. The Other Laura says

    So, go kick some grad school ass already!

    August 24th, 2010 | #

  6. Vixen says

    I would think the cakes alone should cover grad school, right? Keep the truck you might need it later…

    Go forth and kick it, lady!

    August 31st, 2010 | #

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